Two weeks and a day of misery over a letter grade is just too much. Amid the sea of ‘A-’s in my grade slip, who would have thought that an uninvited alien letter would exist. Yes, a notable D is a BIG mush pit in this paper island. F*CK! And hell, I got the grade just because I’m a DEVCOM student who does not deserve to be called an AGGIE alumni in three months time, or so I thought.

Seriously, this is the first time that some potato-and-quail-egg-looking professor had to push about 60 students down without any reason at all. No, I’m not talking about nonsensical things here, it is the one who’s NONSENSICAL in its own system.

This was its so-called intangible and perfect grading sessions that we all wished we have not encountered:

1. Its faulty system for the Marketing Project. This activity is good for the marketing lesson. However, there was a glitch with its system. He did not limit the trays that a student can get per day. For some students who had all the time and resources to sell eggs, they ordered 20-40 trays or even get every tray available when they have the time to visit Manresa. Some students who cannot afford to sell 20-40 trays a week, they only go there when they have time to get their share of eggs. In some days, according to Manong Barudo, the students cannot get enough eggs when the Pryce Plaza hotel orders a thousand quail eggs. Therefore, some would never get the chance to get enough quail eggs as what some can get. The issue that we want to stress there is that at the end of the semester, only a few students were able to gain P3,000 – P5,000 when some only grew P300 or less.
2. ON MAJOR EXAMS, the handouts are expensive and bulky. One handout costs about P120 while other handouts range from P60-90. Therefore, if we sum up the possible total money we shell out for these handouts, it costs approximately P400. In the first place, IT should have announced from the start that these handouts can be too expensive and that we are to read a maximum of 240 pages per major exam. For us who are taking the subject as an elective, it has been a burden because it takes so much of our money. Another reason is, most of us are scholars and we cannot just simply ask money from our parents. In addition, how can we even read a 240-page handout given on the week of the exam?
3. Rodeo Practices. There were two Sundays (July 19 & 26) during the ten-day break caused by the spread of A(H1N1) virus in our campus and one Friday (July 31) for the feast of St. Ignatius (a university-wide holiday) that the batch was asked to practice rodeo in Manresa. It, since it is a doctor, it should have known that some students might be carrying the virus and might be spreading this to the animals and also to the students available during that time. It was clear in the university memorandum that all classes are to be SUSPENDED. Also, the feast of St. Ignatius is an important event of the university and this should be used to commemorate St. Ignatius and notfor its SUBJECT only.
4. RODEO/BUYING OF SEEDS as an alternative. Aside from the no-classes practices, the lab sessions were also used for us to practice the activity more. Therefore, all of us were able to practice how to do ‘RODEO’ and we learned the purpose of why we were required to perform the activity. For some who were not able to attend the FINAL competition (since it was held, again, on a SUNDAY), they were asked to buy three packs of seeds per variety (five varieties). A total of 15 packs of seeds were asked to be bought. The problem with that is that the buying of seeds was not a good alternative for the activity since it does not have any connection with Rodeo. Also, we did know how the seeds will be utilized or where the proceeds will go.
5. FEEDING of FARM ANIMALS. For the whole part of the first term in the last semester, every tuesday at 6am, twelve groups from each class were asked to clean different animal houses alternately. The batch wants to know if this activity was recorded and fairly graded in its class record.
6. THE FINAL REQUIREMENTS

• FEED FORMULATION – This was the hardest exam we took for the whole semester. We consider it appropriate for the course. It was also good that it gave us the freedom when to submit the paper. Most of us took the exam from 9am to 3pm, sacrificing our lunch. The question that kept us puzzled is how it did the grading of the exam especially that we had different answers and very long solutions. Some students said that the exam was scored with a total of 100 points, however, most of us only got 5-10 points.
• • This activity has a twist, though. Usually, ‘it’ credits the students with plus five points everytime they are the first to pass their exam papers. On one of the student’s case, she took the exam for about four hours and for the final mark-up, she only got five points for this exam. On the other hand, the student who passed his paper first, even without answering the exam, got an insubstantial FIVE points.

• 1. THE MOVING EXAM – Although it was difficult, this exam was the most appropriate among the four that is identified as final requirements. We identified grasses, equipments, and animal species – a proper way to evaluate the learning of students from the subject.
  2. EXERCISES 10-18 –We all think this was the most useless final requirement. All of us had to answer these exercises even when we did NOT perform the lab activities because of lack of time. How can we answer eight unperformed exercises when it was all based on lab activities?
  3. UTILITY PROJECT – The students were asked to buy materials that could help Manresa. It was supposedly OKAY. However, the project was scored inappropriately – the grade depended on the COST of the material. For example, one student bought a material which costs P70, he gained 70 points. All of us only knew about this after we got our grades.

The bloody Grading System. There were students who did their best (although their best might not be enough to the professor) who got the same grades as those who are not often seen in class. It was nice to know that nobody failed except for the fact that most of us got Ds and Cs. This grading system is already very questionable. How did it come up with our grades? If it is true that all of us got the same pattern of grades, it only means that IT may be, as its title suggests, a better doctor than an effective teacher.

***

I know that it is not nice to assume that things were rooted from mere CORRUPTION in the classroom. But the thought that we all pushed to give so much effort, time and money for this subject is waaaaaaaaaay to much to expect for a doggy D

caress me with your
soul’s breath
swift your hair’s fingers
along my bare arms

curve your lips
to my lavish look
fragrance shall flow
smoothly for your sniff

lock your face
close to my ear

kiss me.

In a battle of two, when both are perfectly matched with powers on the same level, ONE should always have to be defeated. There may be different reasons behind the defeat but the person who lost the game was never too weak. It may be of a mistake causing one to fall and wallow in the mud.

However, for as long as we live, there is enough time to win all the battles we need to brave.

Just like in reality, we play games; make mistakes; and get defeated.

But, why, of all the help a loser should deserve, everyone gives a piercing eye and a shower of back stabs instead?

I believe that in the recent battle I faced, I lost.

When I started to get so focused in every magical event which took place in my summer ’09 adventure, an opponent had to boom a nameless catastrophe and tried to turn everything into black.

Of course, I never knew it was a game. But I knew it was a BIG MISTAKE.

I saw the big picture when I started to drop the most important details in my life. And yes, I was on the brink of getting broke.

When I thought that the make-believe was coming into life, I was thrilled and oh-so-willing to give up everything that was yet to come. A foolish idea – yet my stupid brain entertained it and embraced it without any doubt.

I was ready to lose everything just for the game.

I was ready to lose my best-est friend just for the game. I shooed him away almost everyday just to get rid of him. But he never left me. I turned into a pitiless best friend who selfishly thought of her own game. Yes, it was that harsh.

I was ready to lose my dignity; to face all the eyebrows to be raised so high and the bottomless gossips to pour when I get back and receive the trophy I longed to have.

I was also ready to lose myself. I was ready to change every inch of Sozina and turn her into Angelina.

I was totally brainwashed and blinded by the folly and balloons of joy from the game which only happened in a small screen – into the screen of my beloved cell phone.

I was selfish and so was my opponent.

I didn’t care and unknowingly did I play the game with the opponent’s fans happily watching me loosing the game.

I was almost trapped into the opponent’s arms – uhm, i mean, lair. But my BBF didn’t allow it to happen.

Fortunately, I never said ‘I won’ nor did I say, ‘I love you, my opponent.’

Believe me, I never did. I would refuse a million times or for as long as I could. I swear every corner of the world, I know I did not utter those LOVING words.

I just liked the game and that was it.

I was ready to join an adventure with the opponent but I never ever ever exclaimed that I would love to be in his game forever.

That is why I lost the game for being the first to say, ‘I give up.’

And he won all because he was the first to spread the news and intended to twist my line upside-down, curled and zig-zagged. It turned out, he was the first to give up.

Silly Billy. I should have known.

–

But again, I tell you, Billy. I am a brave soul and I would do whatever I could just to let everyone know I was the first to lose the game.

LOL, and I am still lucky that I am capable to defend myself from YOU.

From now on, that would be the last game for you, Billy.

You are now crushed and buried down a hundred foot grave.

The game is OFFICIALLY over.

“O, kay bilis namang maglaho ng pag-ibig mo, sinta.
Daig mo pa’ng isang Kisap-mata”

great.
what the hell was [it] doing in my head?
okay.

BAMBOO IS GREAT!

i luuuurrrvee him so much (including his mates!)

forget melancholic whatevers. It’s bamboo who deserves [the attention]
not any alien around.

i love this. i hate [it].

ahhh! scrambled brain. scrambled heart.

——-

“I don’t have enough strength to move away from you…”

uggggh!!! EDWARD IS MINE! (not ROB) BUT EDWAAAAARRRD!

I LOVE YOU MY VAMPIRE!

———

The rosebushes of make-believe became bouquets
of real likeness.

And so I found myself deeply trembling beneath the wooden covers. Badly trembling again. I have wanted this all my one-month-long of staying out late in school. I’ve been – I guess – the witness of all the difficulties we have surpassed. The fire which stuck in our skins was at last, been at rest and far out-thrown.

The audience dipped their tongues out at laughing our serious indulgent of our successes. Yes, we were laid into the spotlight without some of these spectators knowing how far we have become and what kind of alienable things we have shed. I guess all of the Devcomm graduates became part of this exceptional trial. And we were one of those batches who were almost out of track. But thank God, we got out alive! We were there, witnesses of how the production became an inevitable performance. How it suddenly, or should I say, it became magical in the eyes of the many. I have heard no negative comments from the ones who watched us. Though, there were lapses, they were unnoticed and sealed from their eyes.

I LOVE OUR PRODUCTION SO MUCH that it hurts to let go of the moments that are starting to fade. Yes, we were obtuse but that made us all unique. That made us turn to ourselves and see through the edges. It was a great success. By far, it is the most unforgettable experience I will hold all my life.

DAWBI, mag re-run kaha mi??

*This is my chance to thank Nanette Matillac for a very wonderful storyline! Although you might not able to read this, I am deeply thankful of you for your approval and for making your story a part of our memorable moment.

—

i am a journalism student. but I never saw it winding up before me. i never really even thought that i could be a writer or that i can write. my works are often wounded with a lot of errors – and i’ve been too sad, too regretful that i thought i am better on the other side. but you see, afterglows are great especially when you tried giving up. I almost did. I almost dropped everything because I could not swallow “the tidbits of awful reality”.

my afterglow happened at appropriately 11:45 this morning. Ma’am Van, our journalism lecture instructress, showed me this site:

http://aggies.xu.edu.ph/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=184&Itemid=68

This might be so small to your eyes or too big for the ones who thought that I’m bragging. But I think you should know that this is my first published article (ever) on an online site that is not owned by me. I’m just ecstatically something. haha. call me a loser. I don’t care.

]]> http://soz502.wordpress.com/2008/09/01/imposible-nga-ba/feed/ 0 soz502 http://soz502.wordpress.com/2008/07/06/its-raining-tears/ http://soz502.wordpress.com/2008/07/06/its-raining-tears/#comments Sun, 06 Jul 2008 12:51:17 +0000 soz502 http://soz502.wordpress.com/?p=163 ]]>

The morning came and I had to be ready for school. I was so hesitant to attend my class (DC84 – Journalism) because I had a big fight with my bbf and my so-called ego is under the spell of hot, burning anger. But every time I get to these kinds of situations, I always remember that mistake I’ve made in high school. So, I chose to get up my bed and do the do’s. As I went up the hill to fetch a jeepney (ha-ha! like Jill came tumbling after… lalalala), I encountered a jeepney which was almost full but enough for me to join the passengers’ swarming butts. However, I was too lazy to join them because I wanted to sit on the corner and own it for half an hour in traveling. And so, I joined the alley’s next jeepney and there, I got the corner’s seat for free. Yey!

FATE is already my bestestfriend for always allowing me to see messages through actions and unexplainable coincidences. When I arrived at BDO (near XU), I realized that my bbf was walking in front of me! Uwwwwwwwwaaaaahh! All my plans on escaping from his/her view were gone from that moment! And so I decided to walk straight and pretended I didn’t see his/her big body blocking my way. I rushed ‘til I realized that I arrived in our room and smiled after noticing that he/she wasn’t there yet! Waaaaaaaah. And I was struggling on what to do next because any second he/she will be facing me and start his/her explanation. I had this single decision over the matter and it was (at that time) fixed. I was really fuming and there’s really no way of changing my decision.

Except that I’m too weak in handling bawling situations. I’m too weak that all the rages I feel can easily be tendered. And I love every human who have touched my life – especially my best bud forever (bbf). I guess you know now what happened. Obviously, we’re friends again!! yipeey!

Musolod na, kuya?
Ayaw sah kay ga set pa sila.
Aw. Sige.

later..

Ang naa na’y mic, sulod na.

–

OMGawd! THIS VIDEO ROCKS SUPER BIG TIME!

I love how Haley reacted after ‘she’ pulled the silicon out from the b*thch’s bra. It’s a sweet & innocent smile/revenge or a quiet fight back to what that whore has been doing to the other girls around. The video just can’t get out of my system right now after I’ve watched it for 15+ times. LOL!

I AM INLOVE with PARAMORE. I AM INLOVE with HALEY! Got a problem with that?? ^.-

–

these lines are the original starter of one of the poems I’ve posted here in my blog. Well, Dig deeper and you shall find out. *wink!*